Posted by: littletoe | June 21, 2007

Nun Fantasies

A couple of people have posted recently to the Catholic Spitfire Grill and mentioned how, as children, they pretended to be nuns. These are people who, like myself, had never had anything to do with the Catholic Church.

All this time I thought I was the only one to have nun fantasies! I guess mine was a little different since I had mine as an adult. I didn’t dress up or light candles. I just sat in a comfortable chair, closed my eyes and imagined….

What a life it would be! You would wake up each day unburdened by possessions or appointments. You would pray every few hours and in between your prayer time you would bake bread, tend the garden and care for abandoned babies. You would live in an old stone convent in the country surrounded by the beauty of God’s creation, blessed by the peacefulness. Ahhhh!

I entertained this fantasy quite frequently after I separated from my ex-husband. The pressure of beginning the path of single-motherhood and smarting from the pain caused by that marriage made it so appealing. I was so hurt then and I told myself that IF I ever married again, it would be when I was in my mid-fifties (after my youngest child was 18). I didn’t want to “date” in front of my children and I was convinced I was simply a failure at relationships.

I have since remarried and I have a wonderful husband who I am sure God picked out just for me. He just laughs.

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